The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson

Just what I need at the moment: to not give a single fuck but to do so subtly! After hearing the hype around Mark Manson’s The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, I knew I had to find out how to not give a fuck because my life is a clusterfuck. Though, Manson would consider me seeking and then reading this book as giving a lot of fucks about fuck giving, pulling me into what he calls the Feedback Loop from Hell, because my actions to seek self-help or guidance acknowledges and focuses on the fact that I am lacking in something and am eager to find it—a chill pill.

Manson’s self-help book is full of paradoxes, but once you think about what he’s saying, some of it actually makes sense, like how self-help books mainly emphasize what you lack. Like I said, the existence of this book is itself a paradox because it emphasizes how I care too much about too many things or that I care about the wrong things, my priorities not aligning with my values.

For many situations in which we find ourselves caring too much or in desperate need of escape, Manson uses the “backwards law,” coined by philosopher Alan Watts, which basically points out how we get the opposite result we desire or generate even more problems from doing what would logically, on the surface, make sense. With this law, Manson frankly explains how exactly our actions backfire on us and what we should do instead.

The main topics Manson covers are: the values and metrics (standards) by which we measure ourselves, taking responsibility for what happens in our lives even if what happens is not our fault (how we interpret and respond to events, and how we use our own victimhood), being comfortable in uncertainty and being wrong in order to seek answers in order to grow, seeing your failures and problems as mundane which would make them seem less overwhelming, seeing action as progress even if it results in failure, and accepting our mortality and ridding ourselves of entitlement / do-nothing victimhood in order to refocus our values and priorities to match our actions.

Manson’s The Subtle Art of Giving a Fuck is fun and funny and blunt. Give this book a read if you’re willing to try to understand a different way of thinking, the “backwards law,” so you may reconsider the way you act in various situations, during which you are confronted by questioning your values and standards. This isn’t the book that will tell you how to keep your life in order or how to fix everything in your life. This book will help you figure out what to give a fuck about.

Find The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck here.

For Every One by Jason Reynolds

Jason Reynold’s For Every One is not a book of poetry or a novel in verse, like the thrilling page-turner, Long Way Down. For Every One is one poem in four parts addressed to dreamers, those who dream of doing something big or life changing or even something small that they haven’t tried before. The poem is about being brave and taking steps to become better than you were yesterday and not giving up if you didn’t make it as a millionaire by age twenty-five. The poem is about what “making it” even means and what’s on the other side of “making it,” how he—Jason Reynolds—has yet to “make it.” I know, right?

Reynolds writes, “I don’t know nothing about that. / I haven’t gone through it all / and come out on the other side.”

Easily read in one sitting, For Every One sounds like a graduation speech of truth. You may not reach all of your goals, for they may be loftier than you first thought, but “jump anyway.” This poem is a motivator, nothing you haven’t heard before if you graduated college or high school—hell, probably even middle school.

However, Reynolds’ free verse is as disembodied and free-flowing as he urges you to be. His experimentation with lyricism and form pop up every now and then, which made me Ooo and Ahh, but those moments were rare and I had to remember this poem isn’t supposed to be as tormenting and gripping as Long Way Down. His play on words and their meanings give it that graduation speech vibe, and he even calls the poem a “ramble” at the very end.

Now, whether or not this is a meaningful ramble rests on the shoulders of the reader. If you’re going through a big life change or you need a push to take the leap, then maybe you need to read this. Or have someone read it to you. Or have Jason Reynolds read it to you himself because I’d feel pretty damn motivated after that.

Find For Every One here.